Jonas is an artsy guy. Photo: Oli Gagnon

Back in my day if you were good at something you were expected to brag and exploit whatever special skill you possessed beyond a reasonable doubt. If you were lucky, others would see value in this talent and grant you some of life’s little amenities – like a seat at the cool lunch table or feeling a popular girl’s boob. Jonas has been doing pretty well with this snowboard thing for a few years now, but you would never know it, as he tends to keep his trap shut about such things – at least for this interview. Or maybe he’s just a loner and prefers the nerdy type.

What’s the most biggest, most expensive item you’ve ever stolen?

I was never very good at stealing. But I’d have to say Polaroid film – if you added it all up. I tried to steal a digital camera once from Best Buy but got caught by one of those guys that stand at the front door.

Do you ever see your buddies at the House of 1817 blog branching out into other areas of the industry, like accessories or outerwear? Maybe those creepy socks that fit onto your feet like gloves?

I don’t know about freaky socks or anything, but they’re in the making of their first movie as we speak. It should be out this fall, so keep those eyes open!

Riding concrete is a true Minnesota-bred skill. Photo: Oli Gagnon

What about the dudes you live with – who’s the house slob?

Viktor and Brandon – they always leave the toilet seat up.

Shanty stud?

Dan, if he doesn’t end up with a lazy eye by the end of the night.

Eater of everybody else’s food?

V-quick.

Midwest tree runs. Photo: Oli Gagnon

Does it bum you out when any of your so-called friends hit on your sister?

Luckily I don’t have to witness any of that. But go ahead, give it a shot and see what happens.

How about if a female friend hits on your brother?

I think it would bum out Jordan’s girlfriend more than me.

You ever ran away from home?

I’ve tried a few times, but I always ended up back at my house by the end of the day.

Enjoying the Minnesota sunshine. Photo: Oli Gagnon

When did you first begin to piddle about on a snowboard?

My brother and I started skating the summer before we went snowboarding – I was eight and he was eleven.

One of our friends had a sketchy Black Snow and he let us try it out. For as out of control as we were, we both thought it was the coolest thing ever. We started begging our dad to take us to Hyland Hills, which was only about a half mile from our house, until one day he finally did. That first run we rode up the lift with no feet strapped in. I was too scared to get off when we were supposed to, so I had to bail out when the chair started to turn around. It was only five or six feet, but it felt like I was falling for a good minute. Next run, we went straight to the high-speed towrope. Obviously, without being able to ride down the hill, I wasn’t going to be able ride up the hill either, much less while holding onto rope with a bunch of older kids yelling at me for getting in their way. Once I ended up grinding my cheek on the rope when I fell that left a scab the size of a baseball. I thought I was going to look like Two Face from Batman for the rest of my life.

How do you occupy your time on the days you hate snowboarding and your friends?

I visit my lady Rachel – she always cheers me up. Maybe go swimming, ride my bikes, read, and draw or take some pictures – something along those lines. If all else fails, I’ll just eat my problems away.

How long have you been riding for Academy now?

Pretty much since they started up – seven years or so.

Would you say you’re well fed, or tossed merely scraps from the master’s dinner plate?

Eh, it’s enough to live.

Name a band you pretend to dislike when your friends are around?

Chumbawamba.

Minnesota freshies. Photo: Oli Gagnon

Have you ever had a real job?

I worked at Michaels (arts and craft outlet) and delivered the Minneapolis/St. Paul Star Tribune newspaper with my dad and brother.

To what heritage is your superior upper lip decoration owed?

I’m half Peruvian and half Scandinavian.

Do the mustache ride jokes ever get old?

I haven’t heard enough of them.

Did your parents make you go to church when you were a kid?

Yeah, a Mormon church, but I can’t remember the last time I was there.

Jonas goes fast. photo: Oli Gagnon

Have you ever seen that movie “Trading Places?” Let’s say you had to swap out lives with one of the Tech Nine guys – who would it be?

That’s one of my favorite movies! I would probably switch with Bradshaw – he’s the baddest dude I can think of.

Would you assume his identity or would you start dressing and acting like yourself?

Maybe just act like him; I think it would be pretty fun.

Obama or Nobama?

Obama fool! It’s funny to see people with bumper stickers against him – some of them are pretty creative.

What’s the worst you’ve ever hurt someone – mentally or physically.

When I freestyle battle anyone, I feel pretty bad for ‘em. Especially Brandon.

Has your Minnesota Nice ever prevented you from getting beat up?

Nah, I’m pretty good at weaseling my way out of a fight.

Thanks and/or raise requests?

Everyone – except guidos and juggalos.

Part bear. Photo: Oli Gagnon