Allison Grohel butter

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The girls division, Allison Grohel

Having been to events on both coasts and plenty in the Midwest, I’ve noticed one really big difference. On the coasts anyone under 18 competing is usually stacked with skills. In the Midwest if you’re over 18 and competing people are looking at you funny. I think this might be what people call “Midwestern sensibility” and I think this is also what leads people in the Midwest to get married at 20 years old. Seriously that’s not just a Utah thing.

Needless to say the kids, and some old people, came out in full-force for the annual Empire Collective Picnic in the Park at Devil’s Head Resort. It was a huge year for the Picnic as Joe Sexton, the current favorite son of the Midwest, was there to show off his new pro model, sign autographs and get mobbed by kids.

But that’s not all! This year’s event also coincided with the last stop in the region for the Red Bull Buttercup. This was huge, like the time Metallica and Guns’n Roses toured together (not that anyone who competed in the event will get that reference.) As is typical for the company selling the most profitable product in the world, the event was not a minor affair. They had DJs Kid Cut-Up and Why B making music in the back of something like Optimus Prime while the youth of tomorrow got down to the trickery.

The obvious highlights of the contest were Eric Groman (Age 18, resident old man) tossing flips off the dragon tale box, Allison Goehel (Age 13, tops) buttering the shit out of everything, and TJ Homan (age 9-ish) who rode harder than most people four times his age. In the end it was Mikey Stilling (Age 16, but a hard 16) who stuck a back-3 on/Rodeo out that took home the Buttercup.

After the awards we handed out there was a Dodgeball game that was essentially Mikey Stilling and His Alpine Valley Dirtbag Crew versus the world. I’m pretty sure they won most of the games even though they only seemed to want to get Joey Sexton out. There was no way he could compete with their youth. The night wrapped up with the DJs back in action, a ton of dancing and drinks for the few people old enough to get them.