The Art of the Craigslist Ride Share
By Justin Leveille • Feb 2nd, 2012 • Category: Features, Latest, Random
Not all of us snowboard scrubs have enough cash to afford our own wheels. Whether you want to blame yourself, Obama, or the lack of affordable jetpacks at your local Macy’s, we still have to find a way to satisfy the itch. As a seasoned veteran of the Craigslist rideshare, here are some tips on how to recognize a sketchy ride. Yes, these tips are based on my scariest Craigslist encounters.
Sketchy Scenario 1: The Druggie
If you are reading an ad about someone who really wants snow, be weary, this is craigslist code for an illicit drug I dare not mention. Reconsider your ride if the user “M0nta1nof5now@hotmail.com” wants to meet you under the local sketchy bridge and inquires about you wearing a wire.
Sketchy Scenario 2: The Pervert
If your ride does not want monetary compensation and the description reads something like: “No Money needed, Long arm reach is a must for an old fashioned, guy like me.” Ask yourself if your need to snowboard outweighs your moral issue with random sexual favors.
Sketchy Scenario 3: The Looking for a Lesson Guy
If the post is from a beginner who wants a free lesson in trade for a ride the answer is simple: is the person hot? Do not hesitate to ask for photos, you could have to spend an entire day with that beach ball!
If it’s a powder day: you know the saying, no friends on a powder day, especially ones who can’t tell the difference between a tail grab and a toe-strap. I suggest you agree to the ride and run for it as soon as you have your board in your hands. As for getting home, go to the mountain bar post-shred and hit on the easiest looking candidate. Again, ask yourself the same question posed in example 2.
Sketchy Scenario 4: The Shitty Tunes Guy
If the ride to the mountain is longer than an hour and the person’s personal e-mail directly tells you that you are going to hate their music, avoid at all costs. Some Examples: “DaveMathewsMarymeplease@gmail.com,” “DUbsteponyourface@aol.com,” “Kornrows@hotmail.com,” “gonephishin@uvm.edu,” “LUVLIMPBIZkIT@webmail.com” “Bieberfever2012@yahoo.com” or my favorite “Hot4hoobastank@netgear.com”
all illustrations: Justin Leveille
gonephishin@uvm.edu
this is golden
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i have no problem “going down” for a ride to the hill
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Hidden due to low comment rating. Click here to see.
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Um, starfox, you do realize craigslist did not exist in 1970? or 1980 or 1990 for that matter.
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clam chowder
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Pretty sure gonephishin@uvw.edu was my email address from 99-03. That’s embarrassing.
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@??? yeah i do realize that, but honestly, this just seems like some stereotypes that justin came up with, and idk a single person that has or would use rideshare to get to the mountains
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Starfox, you are retarded. People are broke, especially the kind who snowboard. And carpooling is a good idea. Less traffic less emissions, and more shred. 1970? come on
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starfox, just because you and the rest of your 10th grade class hasn’t used craigslist for anything other then trading pokemon cards and lookin at free (fat 40 year old) nude pictures, doesn’t mean that people don’t use craigslist for such things, back in the late 90′s and early 2000s i used the forums from local mountains to get rides all the time.
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starfox’s dumb comment:
“idk a single person that has or would use rideshare to get to the mountains”
Just because you don’t know anyone doesn’t mean it’s not happening. Try leaving the rock you live under once in a while.
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btw…nice job Justin, i’m glad you added illustrations because it makes me feel like i read more than i really did.
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LOL SILLY STARFOX. EVERYONE KNOWS JP WALKER DIDNT INVENT THE SNOWBOARD TILL THE 1990′S
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God, a Yobeat base graphic would be sick
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Why do you think that pervs like M3? Did their team creep on camper girls like Tim Windell’s ballsack?
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^yeah what do we have to do to get one of those bad larrys
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yea starfox, ur so totally a faget
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#4 totally happened to me a few days ago haha
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Justin, you look oddly similar to that cartoon crackhead
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i used to luv m3 too….still bust out the wittlake promodel every so often
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Starfox, you are truly a fucking idiot. Glad Mom and Dad sprung for you to own a car, but people all over the country craiglist rides everyday. Just because you’re too young to leave Mommy’s eyesight doesn’t mean the rest of us are.
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I’ve dealt with the dubstep fan and the korn fan too many times. Who the fuck listens to Korn anymore?
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YoBeat!
!
Send this here allstar intern to cover the Banked Slalom OR ELSE!
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THE MCCRAW HAS SPOKEN (CAW)
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MC CRAW HAS BEEN HEARD! and yea justin aka stan is indeed the crackhead in the first illustration
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^this is true, i am the crackhead in that scenario, not the snowboarder
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