Shaun White Double Alley Oop Backside Rodeo to the maxxx
By Gregory Frank • Oct 25th, 2012 • Category: Features, Latest, Random
It’s been a minute since Sean Blanco, the World’s First Perfect Snowboarder™, blew all of our collective minds. Thankfully he got together with his sponsors, Walgreens and Stride Gums or whoever, and released a quick edit about himself, naturally, being the first person to land the double alley-oop backside rodeo while simultaneously being the World’s First Perfect Snowboarder™. I guess this is somehow big news, because you know, double-corks and all. The edit is only a couple minutes long, but I ended up watching it like 30 times and just to deliver this breakdown.
This really is scholarly work.
0:06—I’m Juan Whyte, I’m awesomer.
0:09—“Hey guys, don’t forget about my skateboarding career.”
0:13—While huge, this method could look better.
0:18-38— You guys remember the year the XGames had the spoken word artists doing bumps before and after the commercials? One of those artist was Beau Sia, who I later saw open for Atmosphere, and he rapped into a shoe as though it was a phone. This is the lasting impact the XGames made on me.
0:43—You might want to check the uncut version of this piece. The actual transcript has Shaughn saying, “I expect a lot of myself and I’m a bit of a perfectionist…which is why my Stride Shown White Whitemint gums comes in a 14-pack. I told Stride we need to take these gums further. We couldn’t just stop at 13 pieces. We also have to give it a name that blows the customers’ minds. That’s why we called it Whitemint. I mean, have you ever had a Whitemint? No. Because it’s very rare mint. It might not even be real, but that’s what we wanted. Something that really just went further than reality, packed in to a piece of gums that comes in a 14-piece pack.”
0:44— The Who? Come on Shawn, nobody really likes The Who.
0:50—Okay, I would really like to have someone who just shows up to tune my boards. That’s pretty rad.
0:57— WHOA, costume change! The Shon Whyte line for Target is looking good for the Fall/Winter 2012 season.
1:06-10—I assume the coach yelling is the pipe jock version of the walkie-talkie squawk “Travis Rice, dropping” voice over in other movies.
1:19—Talking about half-assing and not fully committing should be seen in juxtaposition to Shaun White Supply Company products.
1:21-34—Coach talk. Nothing is more compelling to the shred community than coaches.
1:39—Failed attempt #1 (Man, I hope he can nail this move within his third attempt.)
1:46— Let’s turn to this 1970s-era James Bond villain for some motivation jibber jabber.
1:50—Failed attempt #2 (DANG, the pressure is on now)
1:52 Let’s kick it back to Brad Pitt on the set of a River Runs Through It. Last time he told us of the secrets to success, hopefully this time he’s going to tell us how to use them.
2:05-ish—Attempt #3. (Shit, will he do it?) More coach talk and then WILD SUCCESS! Shaun Whyte lands the first ever double alley-oop backside rodeo, the world of pipe jockery just went to a new extreme. FOURTEEN PIECES, MUTHAFUCKERS.
2:08-20 Viewers, in case you missed the importance of this event, which happened sometime in the passed couple of years, we’re going to turn up the dramatic music and show it over and over from several different angles. Then you should understand the importance of what you just witnessed for the first time ever in the history of dudes on snowboards.
2:25ish—I’m pretty sure Hansu is talking about his debacle in Nashville during this part.
2:33—Title card: Beyond Reason. Stride Gums.
God, I hate this damn ginger faggot.
Like or Dislike:
69 
19
id suck his dick
Like or Dislike:
18 
11
Hidden due to low comment rating. Click here to see.
Like or Dislike:
13 
64
i bet shaun got ender with an all pipe part in too hard
Like or Dislike:
34 
2
Have we checked this kid yet?
Like or Dislike:
73 
0
he has no soul
Like or Dislike:
12 
5
I had a VERY tough time getting through that. “it makes sense to do things out of my comfort, it’s what I’ve been doing since I was 7″
2 xtreme 4 u!!! and fuck you yobeat for posting this and reminding me he’s involved in skating too
Like or Dislike:
5 
1
aaaaaand, i hate him even more
Like or Dislike:
13 
2
Where is over produced video for elana hight, she did one last winter too
Like or Dislike:
7 
0
im down
Like or Dislike:
2 
4
i learned this trick to get medals!!!!
Like or Dislike:
13 
3
Michalchuk did this shit in 1999… bigger and more stylish.
Like or Dislike:
49 
1
hes gay but that trick honestly looks really cool
Like or Dislike:
8 
10
that video right there, was paid using Forum’s 2014 design budget.
Like or Dislike:
91 
0
That “method” does not deserve to be called a method
Like or Dislike:
8 
5
you know it’s going to be a really awesome snowboard edit when the video’s ad is about the NFL…
Like or Dislike:
6 
0
james bond villain. nailed it
Like or Dislike:
3 
3
didn’t luke mitrani do this like 2 years ago?
Like or Dislike:
25 
0
that gum tastes like a fresh baby diaper
Like or Dislike:
2 
0
Where are all his friends?
Like or Dislike:
59 
0
This is the first post I have seen in quite some time and it makes me never want to come back to this website again. Your horrible attempts to rip on him actually make him look good. You are not funny. You are a joke of an editor.
Like or Dislike:
27 
41
Hidden due to low comment rating. Click here to see.
Like or Dislike:
5 
32
http://www.youtube.com/watch?feature=player_embedded&v=L6rwcvxFF9g#!
0:43
Like or Dislike:
11 
0
@connorsouthard
Get over it, if this is your first time on here in awhile, then you’re not the type of person this caters to
Like or Dislike:
9 
6
why doesn’t anyone like me? -__-
ohh well… at least i have my metals.
Like or Dislike:
7 
9
So a bunch of kids wearing dumb pants are pissed off at a kid wearing dumb pants while making a shit ton of money.
Like or Dislike:
35 
1
dat stance doe
Like or Dislike:
2 
2
dang that new halo game looks kinda cool
Like or Dislike:
5 
0
^u have it all wrong no one likes him because he’s rude c*nt on the hill and he makes scooters
Like or Dislike:
10 
3
The next trend will be to not hate on Shaun White.
Like or Dislike:
25 
3
am i cooler on the lift if i say i do not like the shaun white?
Like or Dislike:
6 
0
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=L6rwcvxFF9g&feature=player_detailpage#t=42s
Like or Dislike:
1 
0
I wonder what it must be like to have no friends…
Like or Dislike:
2 
3
there still isn’t any snow in massachusets
Like or Dislike:
13 
0
my favourite part is when he rode with his homies
Like or Dislike:
32 
0
So, theres no money for Forum, but they still continue to pay this penis. da fuq Burton.
Like or Dislike:
6 
2
dudes bangin bar rafaeli tho…. and who the fuck told him that fur coat was tight?
Like or Dislike:
3 
0
shaun white is about to frank lucas you bitch’s wid that mink coat
Like or Dislike:
3 
0
i want to see shawn do a kickflip on flat. That’d be impressive
Like or Dislike:
0 
3
1: yobeat makes fun of snowboarding a much as they help it out. IT’S IN THEIR FUCKING MISSION STATEMENT!!!
2: I’ve been smoking weed and watching the Price Is Right every day since Monday. There was a fucking blind man w/ seeing eye dog on it today. A FUCKING BLIND GUY!!! The dog didn’t guess for him though.
3: Rumorator tickled the nether regons of my soul with this piece. It was pretty darn tootin, and if you say otherwise you’re a terrorist and hate ‘Merica.
4: Someone needs to shave Blanco’s vest.
5: Coaches aren’t the worst thing to happen in snowboarding…skinny pants and soccer/snowboard moms are.
6: Snowboarding is gaysauce. Grab a pair of Sleddogs and get fucking ill.
Like or Dislike:
20 
1
I still can’t believe how many people support this douche, sure hes a good snowboarder and the ONLY, i repeat ONLY reason shaun white should get any respect is because of how much he “pushed the sport” even though that trick has been landed before and hes just claiming to be the first one to land it… lets face it, he is the only one cocky enough to make a video about himself learning a trick.. and dont forget, hes a pro skater too…. the dude has no friends and misses out on the whole purpose of riding the mountain… TO HAVE FUN WITH YOUR FRIENDS… but he doesnt have any to ride with.. just a douche coach to yell at him and make him more cocky. ask any other pro snowboarder what they enjoy most about the sport.. they will most likely say, “Riding around with my friends” or “getting pushed by my friends to try something new”.. but no, I bet shauns favorite part is riding his PRIVATE pipe with just his sponsors, douche coach, and of course his best friend… HIMSELF… lets just all be reminded of why he really learned this trick…. BECAUSE HE NEEDS MOOOORE MEEDDDAAALLSS!
Shaun White is the worst type of snowboarder, and the thing that sucks is that kids that dont know the sport think that his lifestyle is what snowboarding is about… and Im pretty sure he pays out the judges at the X-games.. he touched BOTH of his hands, thats like 3 points off for any other rider in the competition.
Like or Dislike:
2 
4
By the way, HE WAS NOT THE FIRST TO LAND THIS TRICK, look for yourself, trick is done way bigger in 1998 by Mike Michalchuk.. that guy deserves all the respect anyone gave this video(if any)
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=L6rwcvxFF9g&feature=player_detailpage#t=42s
Like or Dislike:
6 
1
Yobeat needs to have some brutal make-up sex with the Overlord of the Stunt Ditch, then film it, then release it at Kmart stores on DVD and Blue-Ray
Like or Dislike:
0 
0
yobeat should die
Like or Dislike:
3 
3
I wonder if shaun white has figured out yet he wasn’t the first one to land it… maybe he’ll get drunk again and trash another hotel room in embarrassment.
Like or Dislike:
2 
1
Gave this video another go to see if I still felt the same about it…
Well, I ended up sharting my Jockeys boxer-briefs. No, not what you’re thinking…not from the gnar that is this boring video of Carrot Top as a post-op transsexual, but rather from the Son of Baconator I got from Wendy’s.
But would I do it all over agin if I had the chance…? You betchya, sailor. Only regret I have is getting a Coke instead of opting for the 1/2 Sprite, 1/2 Hi-C Fruit Punch combo.
In closing, Chone Whyte is gooder than most on a shred stick, but I am pretty good at picking out the girl at a party that I have the best chance to get to share my population paste with.
Like or Dislike:
0 
1
All that video inspired me to do is run to Home Depot and buy some of that schmancy new paint.
Like or Dislike:
1 
0
Jealousy is an ugly colour on all of you…
Like or Dislike:
1 
6
@ sauce pan
U want Shaun’s farts in your nostrils don’t you
Like or Dislike:
1 
4
Dat mormon suit wit tha mink chinchilla ova tha shoulders? My ginger bitch is swaggin!
Like or Dislike:
1 
3
Would you like me to make you a list of other riders who’ve made edits of tricks they just learned?
Anyway, sean wheet smokes the cock.
Like or Dislike:
1 
0
i read this a few days ago:
http://sevenyearswinter.com/videos/ben-versus-shaun
dude is, a douche. i love how he comes across as discrediting another rider for inventing the twirly bird trick before he did… especially, a female! “that fucking bitch!”
it’s also bad when jp is quoted in a recent mag calling white a “condom”.
Like or Dislike:
0 
0
…and i love how that coach guy is like, here’s what you need to do…like that fifty year-old mother fucker can even hike a pipe without a chair assist.
Like or Dislike:
1 
0
Kathy Griffin on a shred stick sure gets you fuckers dicks hard.
Like or Dislike:
1 
0
Okay… I had to come out of my retirement in Hawaii for this one – What the FUCK is with Shaun rocking a blazer with fur Lapels. Is he like channeling Cruella DeVille or something? And he’s just gonna rock that Who pin like he actually listens to them? I’d bet a ten spot he doesn’t even know what decade that band is from. And I’m wondering what the hell he’s doing with that “beard” he’s got going there – I’ve seen stronger facial hair on ten year olds – not sure if he was going for the douche bag look or if he just wants people to think he’s a pirate, but the guy needs to maybe finish going through puberty first because he just looks like a fucking goon.
Okay, that’s my comment for the year. Hope it was as good for you as it was for me YoBeat – always nice talkin story here
Like or Dislike:
0 
0
prettty suuure this has already been done. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=L6rwcvxFF9g&feature=player_detailpage#t=42s …. ginger fag get some friends.
Like or Dislike:
0 
0
Shaun White is like a Richie Rich of the snowboard world.
Like or Dislike:
0 
0
Damn! This fag blows more than I do!
Like or Dislike:
0 
0