*UPDATE: Justin “Stan/Intern” Leveille Gets His Cherry Popped
By Nick Lipton • Jan 30th, 2013 • Category: Features, Latest, Random
*UPDATE: Justin will land in Denver tonight. You helped chose his assignment list this week. Check below to see what he’s got to do, and a few bonus challenges from you sweet sons of bitches. P.S. Rumor has it he said he has this in the bag.
Once upon a time SIA was a beacon of all things good in snowboarding. It was in Vegas, even though it was winter. It was debauchery at its best, even though it was all about work. People did things to their bodies, minds and souls that can never be forgiven, taken back or washed away. In a sense, it was a place that brought snowboarding together. Then, everyone became giant pussies and the trade show moved to the impossibly boring town of Denver, Colorado. Now everything sucks, the best party is thrown by the always cautious Burton and it’s cold as hell. But, this year, we’ve got a virgin going, and not just any virgin, but our virgin. Seeing as this is Yobeat, and we actually like to entertain and have a nice time, we’ve decided to throw this virgin to the wolves, in a grand sacrifice to the snowboard gods. BUT WE CAN’T DO IT WITHOUT YOUR HELP. So, please vote up to five times below to help determine what 10 pictures Justin “Stan/Intern” Leveille must collect and post to Yobeat upon his return. If he does it, he will be rewarded handsomely, if he doesn’t, there will be public punishment. Enjoy!
UPDATE: The follow ten items won out. Challenge details can be found below.
1. We must be able to see your nuts in the photo.
2. If you can’t find Jess, only a man weighing over 200 pounds can be substituted.
3. “Real” tattoo means no cop-out, too-small-to-see, crap.
4. Not the top of some boobies. On the boobies.
5. If you can’t find Bozung, Matty Ryan can substitute.
6. The pro can not know.
7. Make it dirty or it doesn’t count. No pecking here, pal.
8. See Bonus Below!
9. Kids from Colorado, snowboarders without sponsors and anyone “broin’ down” at SIA are not real bums.
10. The Rockmada is a good place to start, someone else’s lapdance is a good substitute.
BONUS (FROM THE COMMENT SECTION):
SMOKE WEED RIGHT OUTSIDE THE TRADE SHOW WITH A GAS MASK BONG.
GET JESS KIMURA TO PUNCH YOU IN THE NUTS WHILE PHOTOBOMING SOMEONE WITH YOUR NUTS.
GRAB A TOO SERIOUS PRO ASS. TERJE, DANNY KASS, TRAVIS RICE, JP WALKER AND SHANE FLOOD ARE ALL GOOD PICKS.
Nick Lipton Every word in this post-even those based on real people-are entirely fictional.
The quotes might be bullshit too.Email this author | All posts by Nick Lipton
Should be let Bozung tattoo his face at the Arnette booth
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And then let jess punch him
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get a picture of someone willingly buying some yobeat swag
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get Bozungs nuts tattooed on his face by by Kimura, then crash a quinicera.
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HEEYY YOUU GUYSSSS
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HEYYYYY YOUUU GUYSSSSSS
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leave justin in denver
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Wait, is he rushing a frat or going to some snowboard thing? Confused.
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Smoke meth, weed is legal and you won’t get in trouble. That reminds me I should go to colorado..
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wait, smoke weed like right outside of the entrance out of a gas mask bong hahahahaha
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Get Jess Kimura to punch him in the nuts mid-photobomb.
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Pull a Winter Park local girl during demo days.
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Get him to grab a pro’s ass… preferably someone who wouldn’t find it funny. Like Travis Rice or Terje. Please?
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the funny thing is, no way that skinny shit could carry brooke home.
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look everyone, Nate Bozung is in this Three Loco video. http://www.youtube.com/watch?feature=endscreen&NR=1&v=7fFVa6oC_rY
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clearly, people don’t know how fun it is to crash a quinceañera
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HAPPY BIRTHDAY YA DAMN INTERN
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make out with hondo
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take a hit of meth
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as far as i know, and i do know, these are all things justing does on a typical night out…. sans pro snowboarders.
LONG LIVE TERRY DACTEEL
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light shaun white on fire
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Boofing some adderal
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Crash a quincinera HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA
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Get Jess Kimura ask him to kick her in the vagina, i seen that shit before.
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do some shitty coke off a mirror in someone else’s hotel room.
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fuck brooke doggy style make an edit with it usin justin beiber
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Justin, I am going to feel really bad for you if the whole simultaneous Bozung face tat Jess Kimura nut punch photobomb actually comes to fruition
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I think half of these should be done on the skiing side. Preferably all the dirty ones
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I think “snipes-ing” a too serious snowboarder is a better bonus.
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take a shit in the Nitro booth booth and blame it on JP
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pleaseeee grab jp’s ass dressed as lipton in his love boat costume.
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nuts in thee face
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